The Silent Longing No One Talks About
The Quiet Knock of the Soul
There is a longing that creeps in quietly. It does not announce itself with fireworks. Instead, it shows up in subtle ways, like a sudden pang of envy while scrolling through photos of sun-drenched streets in Italy or the sight of women laughing around a candlelit table in Morocco. It is that unmistakable tug in your chest when you realize: I want that too.
For many of us, especially women in our wisdom years, this longing grows louder in the middle of our lives. The children leave home. Careers plateau. Relationships shift. You have spent decades showing up for everyone else, and suddenly the house feels too quiet, or perhaps too crowded with responsibilities that no longer reflect who you are becoming.
Yet, you do not say it out loud. You tuck the longing away under grocery lists and schedules because it feels selfish or impractical. But the truth is, this ache for connection and adventure is not frivolous. It is your soul knocking.
The Signals of the Wisdom Years
I have seen this in countless women I travel with, and I have felt it in my own bones. This longing often manifests as a restless energy. You find yourself unable to settle, bored in rooms where you used to feel alive, staring out the window and wondering if there is more.
It often manifests as a feeling of invisibility. At home or at work, you have become the dependable one, the glue that holds every piece of the puzzle together. But in the process of holding it all, you have to ask: who is really seeing me? These are not small things. They are signals that you are craving an expansive and free version of your life.
The Ripple of Aliveness
When I first moved back to Canada after years abroad, I felt this acutely. On the surface, everything looked fine. I had the new house and the right routines. But inside, I was aching for the colours of Morocco and the wide, unapologetic skies of Botswana. I realized that I wasn't just craving travel. I was craving aliveness.
I needed that electric feeling of seeing myself clearly again, not just as a mother, a partner, or a business owner, but as the woman I am when no one is watching. When you finally answer that longing, you do not just fill your own cup. You ripple outward. When you are lit up, your children, your partners, and your friends witness your courage and your joy. You are giving them permission to do the exact same thing.
An Invitation to Follow the Tug
If you have been feeling this silent longing, I want you to know you are not alone. You are not selfish. You are simply human. Your next adventure might look like getting on a plane to Bali, or it might be saying yes to a weekend with women you have not met yet, but who are destined to become your circle.
Give yourself permission to follow the tug. It is not about running away from your life, but about stepping back into it fully seen and fully you. The silent longing is not meant to stay silent. It is meant to lead you home.
This is exactly why I created Grit & Grace Adventures. It is for the woman who craves more than "fine," and who wants to walk the path of joy and culture with a circle of women beside her.
Reflections for the Journey Inward
Take a quiet moment with these questions and notice what rises to the surface:
The Spark: When was the last time I felt truly alive and connected? What was I doing, and who was I with?
The Witness: Where in my life do I feel invisible, and what would it look like to be fully seen?
The Mirror: What sparks envy in me right now, and what is that envy trying to tell me about my own hidden longings?
The Permission: If I set aside guilt or practicality, what is one adventure my heart is craving right now?
The Ripple: How might saying yes to myself create a new kind of light for the people I love?